Circumstance: There does come a point where one who has to be gluten-free can "choose" to be gluten free. Or nut free. But then they have to choose it again, and again. And again. But there is a difference between my life when I resent it, & my life when I embrace it. I have to reframe it for myself & decide what it means to me.
Being gluten free means honoring the boundaries of each person in our home. It's a chance to tailor my offering of nourishment to each person that I'm lucky enough to be with. It's an opportunity to get to know my husband better, & to invent myself as a wife every time I cook. It's seeing my children thrive, knowing my community of food providers as friends, & savoring every bite & what has gone into it.
**What can it mean to you?**
Results: We are thriving, all five of us. We are comfortable in our bodies & have the energy to do what is really important to us, which currently means simplifying our lives. We are planning out a life on a stunning rural property with a gorgeous natural view. We will live off the land along with our closest family & friends.
**What results are you creating? What possibilities loom in your healthy horizon?**
Thoughts: This is such a huge one. We have very little control over our thoughts. I got to see this directly in my work with global activists, because even though they are leaders in their communities, so much of what they actually say is still inherited from their communities. I have to watch what I think & make an effort to replace my disempowering thoughts - "Alzheimer's runs in my family," with new, empowering thoughts. Sometimes the thoughts we are given are so powerful, we have to invent a whole string of new ones to replace them. And sometimes the new thoughts are not even true. But neither are the old ones. They become true, though. The more we let ourselves think them, the more we aren't willing to settle for anything less.
"My body is my own. I feed it power foods that are full of life. It's safe for me to live full-out. I am filled with energy, strength & stamina."
"My child is safe. He is healthy. I accept him as he is & he becomes himself more, every single day. I love him completely & he totally gets that."
**What thoughts are you having? What thoughts do you want to have? **
Feelings: Those new thoughts just feel good. Period.
**How do you want to feel? **
Actions: And that makes anything possible. But more importantly, it becomes an integrity issue to make sure we fulfill on those thoughts & feelings. So not just eating well, but also filling in the gaps of our new thoughts. In the above examples, which are my real thoughts, I need to create this real to-do list:
1. Make myself that green smoothie, too. Not just for the kids. For me. Eat it with them & talk.
2. Walk. Bike. Yoga. Dance. Something Everyday. Do it with the kids. Have afternoon dance hour & let them invite the neighbors.
3. Create. (This is a treat I don't always give myself) Schedule in a daily hour for just this.
4. Watch the kids. Notice when I'm not really listening & listen. They are up to something amazing that I haven't noticed.
5. Put this list up on the wall. It doesn't matter how it looks. It's more important that I am well, & grateful for my life.
**What does your list look like?**
Well, now I have a new circumstance to live into:
I enjoy GF cooking, so I am calm enough to have the kids in the kitchen. We make a delicious dinner together. Then the neighborhood kids come over for dancing, which wears out the kids. I get to see them interact with their community, & how fun, safe & loved they are. I put them off to bed & I have the energy to go paint. Or sew a little something. I sleep well, knowing that I've been with the kids & I've done something for myself. In the morning I wake up D, who used to have the hardest time waking up, feeling like he was literally hit by a car every single morning. Now he hops out of bed & we do yoga as the sun rises. The entire day is before us.
**What circumstances are you living into?**