Urban Organica

on re-entry :: ice harvest, honey, swoonfest

 make your own name tags (sharpie pens on canvas + baby scrabbles)

ice candles light the way to the craft fair.  there's no shortage of magic, here

the ice house...harvested from the lake in winter.  delivered daily to your cottage.

"oh, what's that?" they exclaimed! a refrigerator cabinet.  yes!  with no electricity.  just ice! "ooh.  really?"

In 2005 my darling, funny & very wise friend John Chen gave me some sage advice on re-entry.  He's someone I consider a visionary & business mentor, so I listened closely as he explained that the main reason most "transformational experiences" do not sustain themselves back in the real world is a failed "re-entry."  People need to plan for what happens when we return to our communities as new beings, & realize that they weren't there to see what happened.

At the time I was feeling grounded, supported & clear from nine days with my Jamily at the Institute of Noetic Sciences in California.  And, about to return to D & our then 3 year-old in New Hampshire, whom I had left feeling anxious & more than a little heart-sick.  Now I was bursting at the seams with ideas about giving circles, inspired philanthropy & new models of social entrepreneurism.  I easily could have blow them out of the water, but instead I took John's advice & planned for a smooth re-entry.

As female, it's hard for me to be interrupted by males that I love.  So instead I filled my notebook with photos from the week & said nothing.  Yes, nothing.  When they picked me up from the airport I listened to their adventures, how they had bonded & the tiny challenges they dealt with alone on the island for so long.  When they asked questions, I just said, "It's all here in my notes."  And it was.  

By putting my own transformation aside I was able to take in theirs, receiving gifts I might have missed otherwise.  My son was taller, able to stand up to his neck in the lake & leaned into his father with a whole new confidence.  My husband was taller, having proved to himself that he was entirely self-sufficient as a parent, able to deliver tenderness, discipline & security without my wifely peanut gallery.  

By holding my experience sacred & not trying to have anyone else get it, I got to keep it.  

***

So this year, D & the 3 boys were in CA & I was in NH for the Squam Art Workshops.  3 weeks on, & my family still hasn't seen my photos of Squam Lake.  They have a couple of paintings up & some goodies I brought home from Reform School, owned by my roommates Billie & Tootie.  What they did see is my name tag up there, & 3 short videos over the course of the week.  

 

#1 :: What, to my mind, is what kids most want to know about Squam Lake but never ever heard of.  The Uber-Crazy team effort that is ice-harvesting.

Honey Harvest from Smarts & Crafts on Vimeo.

 #2  A short on how Derek (+ Laura, though you never see her) harvests their honey.  This is relevant because they have a shop in the City which is just our kind of shop, so the kids will actually meet them someday.  And in our family we maintain that honey is always, at all times totally relevant.  

 #3 The swoonfest SAW slideshow by my honorary roommate, Merrilee.  There's a goofy picture of me from a little antique stop & a shot of the paintings they now know.  But I didn't point it out.

I arrived at SAW at 2:30 am before it all began & was assured that no one else was there.  It was pitch black, the driver was lost & nervous, & I had a sudden intense bear phobia.  I was being as loud as possible, yelling to the driver & slamming doors before I realized Merr, Eileen & Yvette were in my cabin. They were sleeping before I got there & needless to say, I was mortified that I had woken them, but they insist they were waiting for me.  Well, I'll never know, but I do love those gracious ladies.  I loved all of it. 

 

good humus farm :: 1/2

set up by farmer annie, jammaker jen + the kids

 

 molly

culling apples for juice + cider

organic farming = layered ecosystems, building habitats for pest predators

snack time :: dried apricots, cherry tomatoes, hard-boiled eggs, melon

field workers getting to know heirloom berries by taste, size

apples, once-pressed by the children

zach, firefighter, farm-boy picking his lunch

midwives for our entire country's produce (muchas gracias, sweet madre!!)

 a chair, a shingled porch after an honest day.  what more do we really need?

I have a 3-inch binder packed with eloquent, heart-melting letters & delicious recipes from Jeff & Annie Main, purveyors of Good Humus Produce.  We just met on their property for the first time: those letters are 2-page bits they deliver to all of their farm members, & came in our weekly CSA-treasure boxes for several years.  I adore the farmer's market & co-op, so we stopped getting the boxes, but I have missed the perspective on those sheets.  Yellowed & broth-stained, they have been a constant source of grounding & consciousness for our family for about 9 years.  

Annie is the original authentic blogger in my mind.  I have memorized quotes from her inquiries regarding true community/individual sustainability & been jaw-dropped at an organic farmer's actual wages.  (Yes, we need to pay our teachers more.  But farmers.  They are the invisible heroes in this world.)  She taught me how to gratin kohlrabi, how to prep dark greens & passed me a favorite soup of thin onions, coconut milk, peas & cilantro.  She doesn't know any of this.  But I can actually feel my heart swelling with gratitude.   Once Jeff gave a nail-biting account of the morning's delivery when the area had been flooded.  As he recounted the condition of their van & his calculations of what was needing to be delivered & the impact of if he didn't make it, or even make it home at all (!) brought to mind the mailman's creed.  Not Wind Nor Rain Nor Sleet or Snow...

We had a chance to spend a couple of days with them, their jam maker Jen & their son Zachary.  It was nothing less than epic.  The kids ran scavenger hunts looking for treasures - like water, compost/soil, habitat & insects before doing skits right there in the orchards.  They made connections about the systems of the farm while weeding,trimming, making ice cream, compost piles, pressed apple juice, garden stones & dinner from produce they picked themselves.   My son, who hates peppers came out of the field chewing a long, neon-red chili pepper that turned out to be bright & sweet.  Before leaving, they found their new "class pet:" Tiger Eye, the biggest, prettiest caterpillar I have ever seen.  Big, like, oh, 3/4" thick & 7 inches long with a red horn on it's acid-green bum.  Apparently they eat tomato crops, so they must go.  And so must I go to sleep.  But the best part of trip was just...Oh, the best...

i heart strawmelon ice cream

straw-melon ice cream

There are many things I Heart.  Ice Cream from fresh fruits.  Family.  Creative Expression.    

 shopping w/ my brother franz + nik, forever sleeping at parties, dave chapelle, us cuz', w/ mos def, me, franz + nik years ago, we sistas

Recently the genius Dave Chapelle had my real-life cousin open with her show, I Heart Lola.  Nikki frequently opens for him, but this is the first time she did her one-women show about losing our Lola's to dementia.  Lola means Grandma in Tagalog.  Really it was about her Lola, but the story is the same.  

Our Grandma Estrella was brilliant & crazy as long as we knew her.  Our Dad's moms were lovely & domestic & fed us ice cream.  And they totally lost it while we were adults.  It sounds harsh to say that, but it's just true.  We both wish we could scoop up our lola's & serve them sweet treats 24/7.  Mine is gone now, & I so miss her, but laughing helps.  It always helps.  

I cried & giggled through the show, but laughed hard going home.  Back stage a very sweet Mos Def was gracious with me while I said silly things like, "I know you, don't I?"  "Are you from San Francisco?"  "No, New Orleans, ever been?"    I had no idea who he was.  Mega-star that he is.  I thought for sure we used to hang as teenagers.  

Fair Warning :: You can work in the entertainment industry, but if your home is media-free, you are in for some embarrassing moments.

Nikki  inspired this recipe.  Marvel at her city-charm in Mickey-D commercial & I Heart Lola trailer below.   

Straw-Melon Ice Cream

8 small strawberries

1 large sweet melon that's soft at the ends

1 cup heavy whipping cream

1 cup raw honey

4 T powdered organic sugar

Blend all.  Pour into ice cream maker.  For fun with the littles, save a few bits of strawberries & cut circles out of a thin melon slice.  Let them decorate & take pics of their desert.

We are so lucky to live in a part of the world with so many fruit trees, good soil & and access to organic dairy.  I wish I could tell you what kind of melon this is, but I can't.  My 10 year-old friend Oliver & I were sharing seeds as I set up our soil trays & I didn't think to label which plants went where.  So our garden has been a complete surprise this past season.  All I know was that this was a big-a** neon yellow melon with a mango-like flavor.    I am all about hard ice cream with a bit of milk to make crystals while D & the boys crave gelato with it's frozen milk-shake consistency.  Even with other melons, this recipe makes a cloud-fluffy cream that is somehow icey and really smooth & creamy.  It makes for a nice family walk around the block.  

***

 

i heart nicole maxali.  join me at her show this month!!

food styling at squam art workshops

 

Nina, Bea of La Tartine Gourmande + Christine of Lavender & Limes

    
 
  

Thea knew what to ask, upping the photography lessons to the next level.  If you want a happy cry for a minute, check out her family portraits, here.

       
 
   

Mentor session with Liz, Kirsten, Bea + Thea

 
 

Brittany of Whatever & Stuff having a personal playdate with the dough & apples.  5 kids, this one has, including 20 month-old twins.  She always makes it to Squam to make sure she has something to give back.

 
   
 

Somehow Elizabeth has taken my love affair with woods + water & sent it completely over the top by adding an apron party with cameras, cooking, pregnant bellies & over-full mamas.  With a brilliant food stylist (with more than a touch of star quality) showing us exactly how she makes her perfect pictures & a brilliant photographer shadowing her every move, asking her just the questions I didn't know to ask.  After making us cry with her beautiful story about why she started creating, of course.   Because women like to cry together & we also like watching French women talk about food & style while we cook.  At least, this group did.  My roomie Eileen & I got to whip up these savory tarts & then bring home sweets to our cottage.  That's when I realized I was actually at camp.  At Camp!!.

texas men

This weekend, D's best friend from high school is coming out for a little belated birthday love.  I have a feeling it's a tiny jab since D skipped his 20-year reunion last month, but I'm so delighted to have him celebrated this way.  Look at these guys this past summer.  You can take a boy out of Texas, but you can never take Texas outta the boy.  At least the ones I know directly.  They are a charming, confident, playful & gentlemanly lot.  You know, the marrying kind...    

Secret Message to Kim :: I'm going to miss you & your gorgeous girls this weekend!!  Just come out!! Come on!! Look at your sweethearts, here.  Too much.

Saved By Soul Food

color week :: yellow

On Friday I found myself sitting in Borders, self-comforting with 3 stacks of craft books, cook books & blogging books.  I love all three.  And I've been feeling totally burnt-out on all three for awhile now.  Some of you noticed my little project on the right, there, The Totally Organized (gluten) Free Lifestyle Kit.  Except, it wasn't a little project.  D & I have been wanting to simplify for a long time, to downsize enough for life to slow down so we could only take on businesses that were really aligned with our values.  Enter the economy, "setting a new stage" for nearly all of us. The Spring brought the perfect chance to create a marketable version of our kits.  I thought these up years ago, when I was just trying to manage keeping a home, & having a hard time working it into everything else I love.  

Eventually these "Homemaking 101" kits became gluten-free-specific.  Friends got word & we've been making small batches of them since last Fall.  We put out a  test site & it turned out that folks wanted & needed them much sooner than we could bust them out.  Even though I've felt strongly for myself that required diets can be a strain on a marriage & a family, it was moving to see how real this is for others.  And the hope of an easier way.  Even more, my biggest wish is to help others do what they do, to help them get the blocks out of the way.  And the GF diet is important because it has people talking about healing themselves through diet.  If anything can save the world, it's that conversation.  So from April to September, I've been working on it 'round the clock, writing, cooking, testing, shopping, calling, editing.  I've missed my kids.  I've been really tired.  And really tired of cooking, blogging & crafting.  Actually, not crafting.  Tired of wanting to craft.  A lot's been put on hold.

I picked up BT's book, which I already owned, for a little inspiration.  A word on B.  When we first met I felt like I already knew him.  He carried himself similarly to my brothers, Elrik & Alvin.  Like, when he walks into a room, everyone looks up because love just walked in.  On purpose & low key, B was wearing a bright green polo shirt with a charcoal tweed fedora!  I'd have worn that if I owned it.  He talked about his Green & Black fund, & that he's Green (being an award-winning Environmental + Food Justice Activist) & Black.  And he had just published his now best-selling book, GRUB, Recipes for an Urban Organic Kitchen.  Nuff said.

B taught me to let go of the diet titles (I was an organic vegetarian) & to eat what my body needs while still upholding my ethical values.  He cooked our crew veggies, then.  I was 7 months pregnant with Free.  2 years later our family was in West Virginia where I was co-facilitating a Leveraging Privilege for Social Change Jam.  B was heading up the kitchen & I was secretly pregnant. B took a special day trip to find me local, natural free-range lamb.

As I thumbed through his book I began to well-up - look at what he's doing!  I called him up right there.  He was at some conference in some far-away state.  He was on his 75th event for the book since it came out this year.  I've been in "mama-mode" for so long, I've forgotten that it takes major work to shift things.

"B, I don't want to market.  I'm an artist.  I just want to make a difference.  And cook."

He stepped outside & dictated a prescription from his latest cookbook, VEGAN SOUL KITCHEN.  

I began with the Simple Stock on Saturday.  And yesterday I cooked from dawn 'till dusk.  It was too dark to take a picture by the time I finished, so I'll do that at lunch, & I'll put together a couple of recipes.  But this is what he said:

"Gumbo Z.  All those comforting greens & that warm-gravy thing going on.  Black-Eyed Pea Fritters with Hot Pepper Sauce.  You'll love that.  And Sweet Cornmeal-Coconut  Butter Drop Biscuits."  

There's friends.  And then there's life lines.  

Thanks Bryant.  Mom's don't need food that's transformational.  They need food that's transporting. So they can come back to their families, as a full & overflowing cup.

Bryant & I in 2005.  I'm 7 months pregnant with Free.  B suggested our Jam take a silent hike through Petaluma's golden hills.

Color Week :: Yosemite

 tunnel view

So it looks like I'll be doing the Color Week this week.  When we went to Yosemite, one of us (can't tell who, I'm afraid) got a mild concussion.  He was checking out a waterfall & bringing back some water to share, when he hit a fallen tree.  We got out of there fine, but he was in a fog for the next week, & we've just been catching up since then.

the boys tell me there's a bear up there.  that black spot, see it?

Tifanie commented on how the color white encompasses all colors.  Indeed.  I'll have to start wearing more white.  We have tiny crystals hanging in certain parts of our house so that the sunlight can hit them, creating wee rainbows across our home.  Aside from being pretty, we like to believe those rainbows represent all possibilities.  They bring in a world of diversity & magic, while also diffusing any energy that's too intense.  It works for us.   D, my brother Franz & I attended Karen Kingston's 3-Day Clutter Clearing, Feng Shui & Advanced Space Clearing Workshop a few years ago.  Each day was so very different - the first day on Clearing Clutter was extremely useful, but really just an edge past "mainstream," nothing you couldn't get from her book.  The next day, which incorporated a Balinese version of Feng Shui, was taught at an entirely different consciousness level, a rung up from everyday learning.  She's the real deal, not out to make friends, but to literally remove blocks & raise the quality of life in one's home & workplace.  And the third day?  Off the hook.  Let's just say that 3 days later I was in a different kind of class, & using a technique Karen taught, I was able to - get this - just stick my consciousness up in the air several feet, then proceed to write out a long menu & grocery list while getting the entire seminar without paying attention.  I was even able to tell where people I knew were sitting in the room of 500 without looking for them.  There's way more to that story, but it's kind of an in-person type of thing.  

D set us up with a picnic on the valley floor.  have you ever seen the sunset on a large-as-life mirror?

This is one of those moments when I'm so aware of the limits of this online format.  Or should I say my own boundaries?  In person, I say all kinds of crazy things, because, as someone who had the chance to unschool growing up, I've seen so much.  And I laugh. A lot.  More than most people.  I naturally go back-&-forth between being very urban, sketchily scattered & totally cerebral.  So it's easy to take myself with a grain of salt, & I'm really comfortable with the range of things I believe, trust & share.  But online.  Well, that's different.  

True just had a book club that featured Pippi Longstocking & I'm always intrigued by her madcap qualities.  Pippi's great imagination has her love life so, she's very human, & has more than enough freckles to leave people feeling authentically engaged.  She leaves people wide-eyed & about 1/3 of the time she says, "Actually.  I'm lying again.  Totally made that up."  She does this for her own amusement, & apologizes afterwards.  She isn't oblivious to her own outlandishness. She is fully self-expressed.  

Like most female bloggers, I consider erasing my blog a couple of times a week.  I'm very sensitive to the diversity of thinkers out there.  I think most people don't believe in many of things I take for granted.  And that they take for granted things I just don't believe.  While I'm committed to being transparent, I'm also afraid sometimes of "going to far" without the context of being together with you, in-person. 

If we could have some tea, I could look you in the eye, know that you aren't so scary & share with you all kinds of things.  But no.  This is why I had turned off the comments, actually.  So that I could connect at a more personal level with email.  But Tif has convinced me to turn them back on. (So be nice!)  I'm trusting that the same forces that have me source, love & support blogs that belong to folks utterly different than me will be at work here, too.  I did start this blog as a reciprocal "thank you" to all you crafting mamas, after all.

So I thought I'd share some images from Yosemite.  There's such a sense of white there, between the vastness of the sky, the shock of El Capitan's cliff face, the waterfalls, & Half-Dome's lunar granite, that I was shocked to discover how little actual white is in these pictures.    The color is missing, but the quality of the color is there.  When I close my eyes & breathe in, I can actually feel the space & the crisp fill my chest as though I'm still there.  In a clear cloud of misted lakes.

color week - white

How about this very Californian grub & his friends moving into my silk worm pod from China?  There used to a single, teeny-tiny hole in it.  And now.  Well you can see they've been busy.  It's kind of like re-fashion or recycled habitats at a bug level.

We're playing a little color week over at Noddyboom.  I love that it starts with white - the one color that is all colors.  I used to think that was black, but no.  Black is the absence of color.  Isn't it odd that you can come to both the same way?  But those are the technical definitions, I'm told.  Like everything else, it's good to question...Play with us!

 

monday :: white

tuesday :: yellow

wednesday :: purple

thursday :: blue

friday :: brown

We had a lovely surprise trip to Yosemite last week, when one of our dearest friends, Ibrahim, married Yasmina, possibly the most graceful & humble lady I've ever met.  Her greatest wish in this life is to be an offering.  A testament to who they are, they told us Tuesday that they were marrying on Thursday, and we arrived to a full wedding.  They were originally going to propose & be married at the top of the Himalayas last year by their mentor, Sadhguru, during a long meditation retreat.  I believe the Chinese government denied entry to their entire group.  So in honor of that image, most of their guests were dripping in beaded & embroidered Indian saris, tunics, dresses & jackets.  A photographer's dream, & of course my camera battery ran out the moment I arrived.  One day I'll have to share it all here.  The boys wanted to know why "everybody was being peacocks?"  The answer?  For fun!

  They were married at the Chateau du Sureau,  which was designed to look like a castle.  Their guests were seated in a circle, a tight  community that calls themselves The BLOB - Be  Love or Bust.  Ibrahim & Yasmina made their  promises in the center of this group, were  married by 4 of their closest friends, & then each looked at every single friend who had traveled to be with them.  The invitation for each person there was to stand for their marriage, to witness, hold &  contain their promises.  This is a wonderful use 
 of community, no?

 They did send us this picture - so evocative of my mood that day.  Happy to see so many friends I haven't seen for years (it was a Santa Barbara + Los Angeles crew), & feisty at being the only one there with 3 young children.  Much more like little dressed-up monsters in an antique castle setting.  These cute teenagers in French Maid outfits kept coming over to fetch our boys so we could be alone with the grown ups. They offered pasta, fruit, movies, a life-size chess board.  But they also were seeing aunties & uncles for the first time in years, & had no intention of missing any of it.  They spent the evening swiping LED candles from the patio & hiding under our table.  And sharing bits from a forgotten baking sheet of truffles sitting on the bar.  

And such interesting conversation.  What a self-expressed group. But another time, when there's pictures...

my sister's a bride

  

  Totally present, completely calm.  The cheetah, that is.  I don't know what that cat's name is, but Renee makes other wild animals feel safe & loved.  This is exactly her, my beloved girl Renee.  She has a serious side that zooms in & gets real quiet.  The rest of the time, she makes us all feel like silly kittens. (She's in Kenya with Project Hope)

Does she look familiar?  You may have seen her in the movie Ray as one of the Raylettes.  Or featured in a commercial encouraging women to vote.  Renee's a New Orleans native, & she spent a week with us right after Hurricane Katrina hit, watching the screens constantly while working the phones, her head spinning with projects & ideas that would help make things right.  One of them: Crepe Covered Sidewalks, a documentary.  You've got to click on it.  And see.  And donate.  Her site. 

One of my sisters got married today, to one of our dearest friends.  Both of them, joyful, conscious, talented, ambitious, & powerful.  Both of them ridiculously playful, uniquely beautiful, brilliant, clear & committed to making a difference. Yogis, foodies, an activist & a social entrepreneur.  These are the kinds of friends you hope get married.  

Aaron & Renee

We are so happy for you guys.  We were with you the whole day (didn't you know that?)  We were that plane you saw!  Thank you for being friends we can really count on, in the ways that matter most to us.  Which is to say, thank you for always growing, for being unpredictable & fresh, up to new things with new things to say.  Thank you for following your passions, loving openly, being authentic & transparent.  No, Aaron, you don't get to be a monk in this life.  I'm glad for it, because you are the ever-confident seer with the foul mouth & wicked sense of humor.  Perfect for you Renee.  You don't waste time with people who aren't spot-on, & you expect laughter with such sweet loveyness.  You deserve all of it.  Thank you both for not being needy, but folks who take care of themselves, while still sharing what's true & sourcing your community.  Thank you for living your dreams, giving back & being a celebration.  

And now you're married!!  It just gets exponential from here! Yay!!

We love you.

M & D & Your 3 Nephews

7 bloggers + 7 slr's + lotsa kids

me. amy. sarah. molly. tricia.  tara.      susan.

photo by finn, from tara.mama.wendy

the revolutionaries will be homeschooled

Wednesday, midday.  Moms, jumping off a laddered platform & careening into sand piles. (Zipline) Homemade apple-cinnamon angel cake +  gluten-free pumpkin chocolate cookies.  Mostly unsupervised hammers.  Nails, 2-by-4's. Jars of paint.  (Red legs, paint in baby hair)  Beeswax candles in walnut shells.  Squirrel-bonking. (don't ask) Treasure pouches.  Handmade clothes.  A pet camera residing 'round every neck.  Kids that all know how to use said cameras.  Our kind of fun.  Our kind of friends.

Conversations that looked like this:

7 year-old on left swing: So have you never even seen a movie?

7 year-old on right swing: I have seen parts of movie.

7 years-olds swing into each other: "Ouch!!" Laughing

I love how homeschoolers tend to listen to learn, not listen to agree or disagree.  They get the information & they just be with it.  Now they know.

Oh, & the blogs: 

amy :: diary of a domestic animal

sarah :: urban. prairie. forest.

molly :: a foothill home companion

 tricia :: wonderfarm

tara :: tara.mama.wendy

susan :: in the kitchen

Thank you for a wonderful afternoon, sweet families.